Wednesday, November 24, 2010

For the Patriarchs -- Yes, You Need Help, Too!

Now don't raise your fist in alarm, keep reading!  We all know that the Bible says that a wife is to be busy at all times with housework (with the exception of a day or two following each birth), but what the Patriarch needs to realize is that the wife needs your help to do all this.  Do you really think that she is capable of knowing exactly what needs to be done and how to do it without your oversight?  Some of you may be asking what you can do to help your wife, and we are here to provide some of those answers.

First of all, rather than being exasperated every time something is not done to your standards in the home, make a preemptive strike!  Sit your wife down with whatever chart or list you have concocted to show her what her duties are for each day/week/month, and systematically go through the steps that she is required to take to accomplish these tasks.  Remind her that "well begun is half done", and also that anything less than a completion of every step amounts to the job being undone.  Just think of the relief she will feel, knowing the task in front of her, and knowing that you have HELPED her to accomplish it! 

Of course there are pitfalls here, too.  At times, your wife may appear tired, or frustrated with her given tasks, or exhausted from dealing with your arrows all day.  Remember that she is weaker, and try not to exasperate her with too much rebuke (unless she is letting her tiredness show a little too much).  Instead, constantly remind her, with a smile on your face, that she was made for this by God, and certainly He will not give her more tasks (through her husband) than she has the stamina to complete!  Isn't that a blessed truth?!

But the danger can come when, as a result of seeing your wife's tiredness, you attempt to do things to UNhelp her, things that ultimately make her job, and yours, much harder.  Whether through verbal cues, or just a sinful look in her eye, she communicates to you that YOU should be doing some of the tasks assigned to her, and if you give in out of your love for her, expect chaos to immediately ensue.  You have now turned the world and its order upside down  in one, swift, weak-leader move!  Unloading the dishwasher, changing a diaper, or cleaning a toilet may seem like a little thing once in a while, but what you have done is to make a lie out of creation.  And the long-term effects are not only possible, but probable!  We already know what they are....we lived through the Women's Lib Movement!  Men, do not be persuaded to abandon your post!  There is no need to get up off that couch, or turn off your Glenn Beck program after a long day of work!  Relax, and glory in the fact that your home is running as it should, and that you, the Patriarch, have helped it to do so. 


In the service of the Lord,
Quivers of Men

9 comments:

  1. I think a compilation "Stuff Patriarchs Like" might need to be in your future.

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  2. I can't get all my work done before midnight on Saturday, when my man requires it finished (so I won't violate the Sabbath). He tells me I need to do more multi-tasking. Is it OK to darn socks while we have intimate relations?

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  3. Absolutely right. We women are not allowed to work outside the home or have any outside interests, so we really have nothing else to do except chores and childcare-- and then we act like that's too much! The only reason we don't get it all done is laziness. Don't let our tiredness fool you-- it's just a ruse to manipulate you into letting up on us.

    The other Kristen (KR Wordgazer)

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  4. *swoon* I find your post so very romaaantic! Please, help me find some man ready to be a patriarch to maaarry me. (yeah, my dad and brother are dead - so I really do need your help)

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  5. Lolz Anon. No worries, I am sure we can find you a patriarchal man. Try volunteering at a state home school convention. Nothing that requires a brain, of course. How about volunteering in the offered childcare? Or handing out those goodie bags as people check in? Or both? Also, do your best to be "caught" sweeping or vacuuming. Do not underestimate the attraction of a woman working.

    Don't forget to always wear a beautific smile on the big weekend. You might even try a bit of extra moisturizer on your face that morning, to try to get a supernatural glow of holiness going. Pick either a Jane Austen halo of soft curls or go for the Renoir "Girl With the Pearl Earrings" look and appropriate head-covering.

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  6. (ps or whoever painted The Girl With the Pearl Earring) It's the look, not the artist, that counts!

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  7. Haha! Vermeer painted "Girl With The Pearl Earring" LOLz

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  8. Joanna Marie, how dare you sit in judgment of a patriarch! Next thing we know, you'll be wanting to open your mouth in church.

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  9. Dishwasher? Indoor toilet? And since you didn't specify, are you talking about DISPOSABLE diapers and not the Godly cloth variety? Any woman that needs help doing those easy tasks with the appliances that you have already provided needs more than a list. She needs to have the electricity cut for a week to really appreciate how easy she has it.

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