Sunday, December 5, 2010

Lions, and Tigers, and Sinners, Oh My!

Recently, we received a question asking what to do when you have "friends" who are not like you. These people come in all shapes and sizes. They might have both parents working. They might go to movie theatres. They might allow their daughters to show their collarbones or to wear pants when doing yardwork. They might eat fast food. They might let their children look straight in the eye of the opposite, uh, gender...or even "date." They might not have as many children as they should. They might be "purpose driven." They might read "Bibles" that aren't the OKJV (Original King James Version). Or perhaps they've never volunteered at Vision Forum conferences or even manned the VF booth at the state homeschool convention. 

Be not alarmed, friends! We are here to help you deal with all types of sinners.

There are generally only two categories of difficult people you will have to come in contact with: those you work with, and those you attend church with.*  We are going to address each category individually.

When dealing with these kinds of sinners in the workplace, make it your first priority to remember that they probably don't know any better. They need constant help. Drop little hints in your conversations. Perhaps your coworker will say something like, 
"My daughter is enjoying her dance lessons so much! Praise God that she has found something she loves that glorifies Him!" 
Without plainly saying that he and his family are living in sin, say something along the lines of, 
"Oh, I didn't know that your family believed that dancing isn't a sin against God. Tell me: what are your thoughts on smoking, or fornicating?"
With a compassionate Christian smile on your face, of course. 

This method is fool-proof.** If your coworker does not come to repentance, you must not have been condescending enough, and Quivers of Men cannot be held responsible for your lack of converts.

Now, concerning sinners in your church. In short, there is absolutely no excuse for this. They are in church, for crying out loud! These people are in open rebellion, and are bent on rubbing their disdain for God's Laws in your face. Perhaps their sons don't wear ties, or they wear colored shirts, or their daughters tie the sash on their dress so tightly that you can see their waist. The best response here is to routinely look them up and down--because maybe, if you look at them long enough, they will miraculously be modestly transformed. Or at the very least they will be shamed into leaving, thus making sure they pollute some other congregation and not yours. Admittedly, we see the latter result more often than the former, but God works in mysterious ways and we believe that when we try hard enough He CAN be victorious!

One of the most important points here, as the OKJV reminds us, is not to be surprised at these fiery trials among you. Many are walking through the very same fires, so you mustn't think you are alone. If you begin to feel this way, please call  the VF Hotline and they will attempt to put you in touch with another family who is living by the same list you are and will be able to provide encouragement as you battle the influence of the less godly.

Stand firm, friends! When we get to heaven it's all going to be worth it to make sure that our children won't have to be corrupted by those who believe that fashion, entertainment (other than croquet and Scrabble), and moonshine can co-exist with the truth of God.

In the service of the Lord,
Quivers of Men

*Yes, unfortunately we understand that every church has members who don't belong because of some type of sin. If you haven't found them yet, you're not looking hard enough.

**This is not a method. We do not recommend methods.


  1. Who are you to judge?

  2. I've found that there are few things more fulfilling than taking happy, love-talking, liberal "Christians" and making them miserable for God like they should be.

    Keep up the battle, soldiers. Weed that garden.

  3. So THAT's what the whole looking-up-and-down method is about. I always wondered...

  4. ROFLOL! Oh my gosh! I can't catch my breath! *pant* *pant* I remember my first experience with the not looking straight into the eyes. I was exhausted trying to continually reposition myself before the person I was attempting to talk to. Fortunately for me, someone was kind enough to explain my moral failure. Come to think of it, they were particularly good at explaining moral failures. LOL!

  5. Yes I too find that snubbery and judgemental HUMPHing under my breath tends to cool the sensual lusts of those worldly-types who insist on shaking hands with the opposite gender. In a CHURCH of all places!!